So let’s be real: $MSTR isn’t gambling with leverage—it’s running a legal money laundering scheme… for Bitcoin.

Institutional funds can’t touch BTC? No problem—buy $MSTR instead and get Bitcoin access with zero compliance tears.

It’s not debt. It’s design. And if you’re still yelling about margin calls… maybe you’ve never seen a real INTJ move.

P.S. If this makes sense to you, drop a 🧠 below—this one’s for the overthinkers who love their math with existential dread.

At 56, the Crypto Derivatives Risk Index isn’t hot or cold—it’s that sweet spot where your portfolio sips chamomile while the market naps. I’ve seen traders try to hedge with one hand… and still cry into their ETH wallet at 3am. Neutral doesn’t mean complacent—it means you’re too wise to panic when Bitcoin’s volatility hums like distant thunder. Pro tip: If your portfolio’s not crying… it’s probably just dreaming of being free.

What would you lose if you were free? (Reply with 🍵 if you’re holding steady.)